Rooster Chase!!! LOL

When we got our chickens way back in March of last year, they were so cute and yellow and little. Do you realize that you cannot tell the difference between a male and a female chicken without turning them upside down and then knowing what to look for. I don’t know what to look for so hey we took out chances. We bought a dozen chicks. One got himself or herself, LOL whichever the case may be…pulled partway through the fencing by something. Probably a cat. But that left us with eleven chicks. They got bigger and that’s when we found out that we had ten hens and one rooster. That would be Humpty Dumpty. Anyway, how lucky was that to end up with ten hens. We just want the eggs.

They got too big for the pen they were in so we let them roam around the yard. At first this was ok but then they got even bigger and so did the poop!!! They started coming in the front of the house and then made their way across the street and poop is following them everywhere. Not only that, Humpty has become a good chicken pimp. He takes care of his women. LOL



One day the kids were outside playing and all I can hear is screaming. I get up to look outside and the boy is running through the yard screaming bloody murder with Humpty right on his heels. The boy makes it to the front porch and fly’s through the door tears streaming down his face and whatever he is saying I can’t understand a word of it. But I already know. Humpty is standing on the other side of the screen door growling. I swear I did not know that roosters growled, he’s doing a dance and making that sound like a growl. So I go outside and pick up a stick and whack him across his tail feathers. He runs off and the boy has calmed enough to tell me what happened. Which was obvious. LOL he goes in the house and I put a movie on for him and he’s fine within a few minutes. But I tell you, the look on that kids face as he came around the corner of the house was priceless. He was terrified. I still laugh when I think about that. LMAO



A week later the kids are outside and the boy is always watching to see where Humpty is…LOL Fifteen minutes after they go out I hear screaming. I’m thinking…good lord can’t these kids get along for five minutes…and here comes the girl screeching, with her arms above her head and she’s running full throttle around the corner of the house. Sure enough Humpty has found another victim. I’m watching this sight and I swear it’s a lot funnier then the boy. I know it sounds mean but I can’t help myself. Its funny! LMAO OK…it was funny until I found out they wouldn’t step foot outside because of that damn rooster. What the heck….go outside and give me a break. They won’t go out at all. You can’t force them out the door. So now I want some peace and quiet. I want them back outside. So I take both kids with me and I am going to show them that Humpty isn’t all that scary. Oh lord what the hell was I thinking. We approach him and he starts growling. I look him in the eye and step closer. That little oven roaster doesn’t back down. So I have to show the kids he is just a chicken….just a damn chicken. So I step closer and the noise that came out of him was bordering on demonic. Both kids are behind me with fear all over their faces. I can’t back down from this “chicken” so I stomp my foot, hoping he will just go away. He doesn’t. WTF!!! I stomp again, he’s still growling at me. OK!!! That’s it…I stomp at him one more time hoping he will back off. I grab a stick, hey I have to look like a fierce chicken fighter right? Both kids are crying now and they are holding on to my shirt. Well this plan got shot all to hell. And all I wanted was for them to go back outside to play so I could have some quiet time. I took one last step toward Humpty and I guess I had crossed his imaginary line because he reared up and grabbed my leg with his feet. Wings were flying. Chicken claws were embedded in my leg, ripping my pants and the sound that came out of that rooster scared the crap out of me. I whopped him with the stick and he went running around to the back of the house. Now….what do I do with the terrified kids that have witnessed this exchange between their Gramma and the demonic rooster from hell. I turned and looked them square in the eye and said “See, I took care of him, that’s all you have to do.” I said all that to their backs as they ran for the screen door and relative safety of the porch. After that I couldn’t push those kids out the door. So my plan for some peace and quiet had backfired right in my face.

As soon as my son came home I told him he had to pen them back up. No more roaming the yard. No more terrorizing the kids (or me LOL). It took another six weeks for the pen to get built (which took three hours) but now the chickens are safely behind a wire fence. The kids go out to play but the boy always goes to see that the rooster is locked up. LOL



Just thinking back on that makes me laugh again.